Overseas not such a big deal

January 2019 Wendy in New Zealand.

When Wendy turned 50 I pledged to take her overseas every year until she turns 60. This could be a bigger challenge than I think right now; but we got our first trip completed in January 2019.

She was excited although the whole concept of going over water to another country was all in all just a little confusing. So we focused on the differences going overseas compared to going interstate on a plane as she had done many times.

So we talked about using her brand new passport and why it was needed. We talked about the plane ride itself and what to expect on the plane. Well here we hit upon what she wanted to anticipate. A movie and food in the sky.

We had planned the whole second part of the trip all around Wendy. All our accommodation had balconies and water views.

She was very much anticipating the glow worms and mud baths. It was going to be a very special day and I anticipated a little emotional as we were doing these things on what would have been mums birthday. How she would love to know the adventures of Wendy.

Getting Wendy to understand that the first half of our trip was business then the second part was fun was a bit tricky and didn’t really come to pass by the amount of questioning of “when is my holiday going to really start.?”; kept being asked.

The day arrived to leave on our trip and we made every stage a photo moment and fun. Something we hadn’t anticipated was the streamlining of getting through airport checking in and customs. Both leaving and arriving we got special treatment and taken to the front of the line. Slightly elitist given that we are quite able to wait. There have been times since when we have travelled that we have said “Where is Wendy now when we need her!”

So here we were first on the plane, Wendy had an aisle seat, a pillow, earphones and snacks for takeoff. Once we checked out the movie options there was pure elation. Mama Mia 1 and 2 – then when lunch arrived and she got salmon and salad, with a drumstick ice cream for dessert, it was heaven. We couldn’t have planned that better if we could have planned it all.

I really don’t think she got the idea of being in another country; there is so little different from her perspective in terms of language, houses, scenery etc than what she had seen around Australia.

But holiday time it was. Once our few days of business was out of the way during which Wendy was well socialized and got to sit and watch the people at the beach and competing in the trampoline competition that we were hosting.

We decided to really mark the beginning of “Wendy’s holiday” with a jet ski ride. Just her and Andy Roo. (the name she has given to her brother in law) Someone had to stay on shore to get the photos!

When she got off the ride the guy managing the business came over to make sure she’d had fun. Well Wendy is not one to miss an opportunity to hug a surfer guy she got up and gave him a big warm hug along with a knowing sneaky giggle.

There was the known side of being down syndrome associated to  “innocently giving warm hugs and but in that sneaky giggle was hiding the cheeky cougar out to score a smooch with any hunk she can get her hands on. Yep, that is my sister.

So still giggling about her moment with the surfer hunk we took to the road out of Auckland to Hamilton. Here we enjoyed the gardens which were very wheelchair friendly and better than the google photos portrayed – We all really had a lovely time. We stayed the night but were on the road early to be able to get the glow worms tour and mud baths in one day.

We were one of the first at the hotel buffet for the breakfast as there is no rush about eating with Wendy. Andrew and I were in the right frame of mind to know we were now to slow down and relax. As the other mornings we had been putting toast in a box with a banana for her to eat in her own time which is 1.5 hours. So we had a very leisurely breakfast.

So much for her enjoying the scenery she slept all the way to Waitamo. We had arrived early enough to go through the glow worm tour on the tour earlier than the one we had booked.

Here it got all emotional and special. Wendy has a fear of stairs where she can see through or if they were too steep. Of which the stairs into the cave were both. So like a little Koala she was put on my back for me to navigate with care all the stairs, Andrew in front to break a fall should it occur.

Meanwhile I was reminded of two things, lucky Wendy is light from being a very conscious healthy eater and I am physically strong from daily crossfit.

 It is only as a result of both that we got her down to enjoy in the magic of the glow worm caves.

Once in the boat at the bottom in total darkness and her trying with all her might to trust us. So fragile she is when her familiar is taken away. Andrew and I by this point were the only reference to normal she had left.

Wendy sat between us completely tense trying to stay quiet but all the while her body was in a state of anxiety. With her seated between us and us both rubbing her back and legs in full side body contact with her. In the pitch dark cave we could feel her little body start to relax as the boat moved ever so slowly through the cave, the whole area above and about us was thousands of glowing blinking, twinkling little glow worms.

Wendy finally daring herself to look up and around; by now I had tears streaming down my face, rejoicing that we had got her there and to know she was marveling at her postcard coming to life, the card I had sent her some 5 years earlier and she had pinned on her board in her room.

She pulled me closer and in a barely audible whisper, succinctly said – “It’s a miracle”

And as soon as she was enjoying and loving it and gazing around composed and more relaxed we popped out of the cave into day light.  The added delight for all in our boats was to then see the beaming sweet smile and wonder on her face.

As everyone else got off the boat they all had a comment of encouragement and love for her. It was memorable and so utterly and completely worthwhile.

Then it was into the souvenir shop to get some postcards and a glow in the dark tee shirt.

Later in the day after Wendy had napped for the whole scenic drive, we arrived in Rotorua at the mud baths. By now the day had warmed up to 30 degrees. A great day to go to the hot springs!

We had booked for a walk around the springs – now trust me walking and pushing a wheelchair over the rough ground was a great effort by us both. All the while Wendy was enthralled by the hot bubbling mud – now this was something strange and new.

Next it was time to get into the bathers and take a dip in the mud ourselves. Wendy is “not a piggy person nor is she a dirty person” – her own words; so this idea of voluntarily putting mud all over herself was a foreign idea indeed and made for some quality laughs.

Next we were in the clear clean therapeutic hot water with a water fall – Wendy was in heaven here. The depth was a depth she was comfortable with and we stayed a full hour until we were all wrinkly.

The next big thing was the biggest Kauri tree in New Zealand. Here we cajoled Wendy up the stairs and we chose not to do piggy back all the way as the steps really weren’t safe. So we allowed her to take all the time in the world to arrive at the big tree. It was worth it and she had to agree if not for the tree but for the self-worth of the accomplishment of getting to the top.  Getting down was also an accomplishment achieved on the adrenaline of the climb up. We milked it!! 

Our experience of having had 4 kids really comes in handy with keeping Wendy on track to achieve these things.

The rest of our time in New Zealand was spent walking on some beaches, sitting on the apartment balconies and painting stones we had found, some lovely little towns explored, and dinners enjoyed together.

Wendy you are a delight, you slow us down to see and  enjoy the simple things in life.